Submitted to the Original Chatter in May 2000

Note:  it's now 2007. Man, how few things change (OK, the leotard references don't count). 

Top 10 Things Not To Do In Class

10. Hold your breath and count to 20 during the heavy routine.
 9. Watch your feet while marching.
 8. Convince yourself to hold your bladder during the standing leg routine with plies.
 7. Not wash your new dark blue outfit before sweating in it.
 6. Laugh at the instructor's big ending as the music plays on.
 5. Gulp down a 44-ounce Mountain Dew for the caffeine.
 4. Bring a dozen donuts to class...when there are 20 students.
 3. Try to fix your th*ng on a triplet.
 2. Believe that wobbly arms with weights overhead is OK.
 1. Scream, "Hey that's my spot on the back row!"

And because we’re Jazzercisers, we had more to add!

11. Expect to have skinny legs after attend a month of Step Classes.
12. Actually yell, "Hell-NO!", when the Instructor asks if "Did you have a good day?"
13. Let your bike tights fall lower than your leotard waistline
14. RUSH the stage when the Instructor says, "4 skips up, COME SEE ME!".
15. Forget to check those WHITE shorts out, before your legs are in the air.

16. Come in bare foot (that's old school) 

17. Sing louder than the instructor (optional for good songs)

18.  Notice just a little too late you've put your leotard on inside out...yes, I've done it.

18a. … or backwards (I've heard of that on two occasions)

19. Forget to wear at least undies under your jogging shorts. Yes, I was behind someone in a class doing side leg lifts

20. Eat Cheez-its. I had a bunch just before class once and felt awful, my energy was zonked. Never again!

21.  If you’re still using the old Resist-A-Ball or the "Ball With Legs" make sure you know where those legs are before you do those upside down plies!

22. Adjust a sports bra that is deciding to support only the upper half of the area for which it was designed.

23. Don't forget to check for trailing toilet paper. I know an instructor who had t.p. attached where the leo met the tights! She noticed the paper and twirled it with great grace and style.

(Apologies to the authors. I don’t have that information.)